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April 04, 2013

Location: unknown

My dearest Brooke,

I pray that this letter makes it way safely to you and you are well. Please pardon my ungraceful language and font selection. Life in the jungle has been difficult to say the least. I often feel like James Franco in that movie, 127 hours, but this feels much worse. I might be exaggerating due to exhaustion, you see, it has been 3 full days since the Internet went out. I am beginning to worry. My cellular phone’s data rations are threateningly low. I think I can survive a couple more days, but I will be thirst is becoming a real concern. I don’t dare check instagram or facebook at this time. Only twitter, but I am avoiding links, specifically to YouTube… however, I must admit, i got sucked into a cute video about baby elephants. But that’s what I get for going to Buzzfeed, I can not afford to make that mistake again. That was an early mistake in my demise.

My thoughts are frequently with you… How long has it been??? feels like an eternity since we basked in the warm glow of a Netflix binge.

Good news. I have been adventuring into new places and scavenging wifi. Some locations have been pretty nice…some seem like a trap, offering wifi to draw in the needy, only to exploit them. I was exploited. I hope it is something you never stumble across in your journey through the world wide web. I am truly ashamed of what lengths I have gone to for the simple use of wifi, and I am really sore.

I long for the days when I can return to your e-side. Where we can instant message from the same room. When that day comes (I am trying to keep a positive mental attitude towards survival), I may gracefully ask your assistance in documenting this adventure. I hope my struggles can be a source of inspiration and caution for others in this world.

You’re Loving and Gracious Partner,

Note to self: Order penicillin online post haste.